hot as teat

oh witch's brew its a hot one today.

i'm very disappointed with the general scope of things when i am sitting, not moving...and drinking copious amounts of water in the shade and still i sweat. the word is certainly coming to an end.

i got up early (10:30..it's sunday though and i went to sleep at the butt crack of dawn) to help my mom find something at J.Jill for a bbq she had to go to with the padre and his Hollywood types. she lives for j.jill, the epitome of mom type jeans and sweater sets. despite her constant lamentations that she HATES to shop, mom is worse that I am if you look at the big picture. When I shop, it can turn into an all day thing but i might not buy anything. when mom shops, it lasts around 30 minutes but she drops a cool wad because if she gets a shirt, she has to get matching pants (ick) and then accessorize...maybe even get some shoes to complete the effect. She's insane. and utterly obsessed with the color beige

J.Jill went something like this: "Oh look Shelly a beige shirt! Does it look too fancy though?"
"Mom, it's a beige shirt."
"Yeah, but you know how I am. I don't understand fashion."
"Yes, but you understand that it's a beige shirt. Cotton. Cotton doesn't scream red carpet affair."
"I just don't want to be over dressed for this bbq."
"trust me mom, half the women there will be wearing 1000 dollar jeans. i think their idea of fancy doesn't quite match up with yours."
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"What about this?" (holds up beige flower printed jacket with lighter beige tank)
"My brain can no longer process anything beige."
"Would it be too much if I wore it with my beige pants."
"Yes."
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After mom finally settles on a beige print silky thing (it was actually quite nice and mommy looked pretty) and mom jeans (she manages to look good in mom-jeans...i can't look good in any jeans....damn my dad genes). She heads to the accessory counter.

"Oh shelly! Would this necklace go well with the shirt and pants?" Holds up a beige dangly thing. "Damn your eyes! Is beige the only color that you see woman?" I made her get a purple beaded thing just to teach her a lesson. I'm going to write J.Jill a note to let them know that they can no longer sell Constance any more beige goods. I think i'll throw in a crack analogy just to get my point accross